


White Horse

by i_write_shakespeare_not_disney



Category: Percy Jackson and the Olympians - Rick Riordan, The Heroes of Olympus - Rick Riordan, The Trials of Apollo - Rick Riordan
Genre: Angst, Cheating, Heartbreak, Hurt, M/M, Taylor Swift - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-09-29
Updated: 2016-09-30
Packaged: 2018-08-18 13:53:37
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 10,006
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8164214
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/i_write_shakespeare_not_disney/pseuds/i_write_shakespeare_not_disney
Summary: The story of the rise and fall of Nico and Will's relationship. All based off of Taylor Swift songs.





	1. Chapter 1

****

It’s been so long. I miss you. We can’t stay like this. Please, just let me talk to you.”

“Why should I?”

There was a long pause. Then, “Don’t you love me?”

“…Yes.”

“Then please give me another chance.”

_***Enchanted***_

“Uh, hi. I’m Will Solace. The teacher said I was supposed to sit next to you.” The dark haired boy shrugged and gestured to the seat beside him. “What’s your name?”

“Nico.” Will nodded. Nico frowned at the overall brightness of the boy who’d been forced to sit beside him. Blond hair, blue eyes, tanned skin with freckles dotting every surface, light colors for his clothes. It made his eyes hurt. And yet he had to force himself to look away.

Meanwhile, Will began to feel nervous sitting next to someone so stoic and quiet and… _dark._ His clothes were all black aside from the gray belt and gray skulls on his shirt. His accessories were all black aside from the metallic gleam of the spikes and studs. His hair was black, his eyes were so dark they looked black, his skin was olive toned and pale, but dark circles were prominent under his eyes.

They sat stiff and wary of each other, casting uncertain glances at each other, flitting their eyes away any time they caught the other looking back.

When the bell rang to release them, Will left the classroom quickly, his nerves in a jumble because of this new school. As he started to turn at the end of the hall, he heard someone call his name.

He turned and was surprised to see Nico racing to catch up to him. “Uh, hey, you left this.” He held out a journal that Will carried everywhere to jot down random pieces of thoughts. He also had his schedule in it. But frankly, Will felt more grateful for the notebook itself.

“Oh, shit. Um, thanks.”

Nico shouldered his backpack and his lips twitched into a half smile. “Um, you’re new right?” Will nodded. “I can help you out with finding out where to go if you want. I’m not good at socializing, so don’t ask me to sit with you at lunch, but… I can tell you where you need to go.”

Will let out a nervous chuckle. “Um, yeah sure. I’d appreciate that.”

For the rest of the school day, Will waited by the library so Nico could direct him to the next class he was supposed to go to. And despite what he’d said about not sitting with him at lunch, he was the only face Will recognized in the cafeteria, so he sat with him anyway. It was awkward and quiet, and Nico kept giving him a confused look which Will returned with a raised eyebrow.

At the end of the day, Will had spotted him at the corner waiting to cross the street. He walked over and Nico glanced up and narrowed his eyes. “Are you following me home now?”

“No, I live this way,” Will said indignantly. Nico nodded though he looked suspicious. They crossed the street and kept walking. Nico kept his head bent over his phone and Will busied himself by looking around at the streets and street names.

Then all of a sudden, “What street do you live on?”

“Strawberry Lane.”

Nico chuckled and scoffed. “Figures. I’m on the next one. Long Island Road. I always thought the street names were weird.”

“Well back home in Houston, we had a street called Fleetwood Mac and another called Three Sisters.” Nico furrowed his eyebrows and shook his head. “I’m serious.”

“I believe you. But… you might want to stop walking if you don’t want to pass up your street.” Will stopped and looked around. Nico had stopped walking at his street and Will hadn’t noticed.

“Oh. Thanks. And thanks for showing me where to go at school too….” Nico nodded and pursed his lips into an insincere smile. “Um…. Nice to meet you, Nico.”

Nico raised an eyebrow and allowed himself to actually smile then. He held out a hand Will shook it. “Nice to meet you too, Will.” He waved and started walking across the street to get to his own, glancing over his shoulder once before Will started toward his house.

_***I’m Only Me When I’m With You***_

“Run, run, run!” Will shouted as Nico laughed maniacally and did as he was told. Will ran right behind him, yelping as the dog snapped and bit at their heels. “I told you not to taunt it!” Will shouted.

“Too late now, Solace!” Nico gripped his arm and pulled him around a street corner, and the dog slipped momentarily, but continued after them.

“I can’t run much longer!” Will protested, gasping for breath. “My legs burn!”

“Come on, man don’t give up on me,” Nico pressed. He pulled him along, but Will was beginning to stumble over his own legs. Nico’s grip never loosened and Will felt the dogs teeth bite onto his jeans.

Suddenly, Nico had shoved him forward and Will toppled onto the sidewalk. For a moment, he thought Nico had left him to get mauled. Then he heard a shout of pain and managed to focus enough to see Nico on the ground, holding the dog back as it snapped its jaw at him.

It was a big husky that looked more wolf than dog, and it had sharp claws which dug into Nico’s skin despite his jacket. Will looked around and saw a long broken branch. He loved animals, but his best friend was getting attacked. He grabbed the stick and swung hard at the dog’s nose. It yelped and jumped off of Nico and growled at Will. Will swung the stick menacingly without hitting it and the dog took it as his cue to run back home.

Immediately, Will kneeled beside Nico who had sat up and was holding his arms with a pained expression on his face. “Oh God, Nico. Come on, let’s get to my house. Dad has a first aid kit.” Nico nodded and stood up, following him to his house. “Sit down.”

Nico did and shrugged off his jacket which was scratched and torn. He held his upper arm and bit his lip as Will set the first aid kit on the table. “Sorry,” Nico said. “You told me not to provoke it.”

“I couldn’t keep up.”

“You could’ve gotten hurt.”

“But you decided to push me out of the way and take the damage.”

“And you went and got it off of me,” Nico retaliated. “In the end you’re still the better person.”

Will rolled his eyes and pulled Nico’s sleeve up. He frowned and shook his head. “It gave you really long scratches. Do you mind taking your shirt off?” Nico raised an eyebrow and did as he was told, hissing as the fabric brushed against his skin. Will furrowed his eyebrows and shifted his weight as Nico’s torso became exposed.

He leaned forward and began cleaning the wounds much to Nico’s disdain. He grit his teeth and spewed profanities through them as Will cleaned the scratches and placed anti-inflammatory ointment to them. Nico’s chest was heaving and Will gulped as he placed bandages onto him. “There.”

Nico glanced at him and raised an eyebrow. “Why are you blushing?”

“I’m not,” he denied, though as he said it, he felt his cheeks burn even more.

“Do I make you nervous?” he asked mischievously, leaning forward. Will narrowed his eyes and pushed him back with a finger against his chest.

“No. You do however drive me crazy with your impulsive and reckless decisions. Now let me get you a shirt to wear.” Nico tilted his head and smiled while Will left.

The two had been friends for two years. They were about to start their junior year of high school at the end of the summer. Their friendship had raised questions at school, but they were never directed to either of them. The two pretended they didn’t exist, though whether that was because it wasn’t necessary or because one felt awkward about it wasn’t clear. They simply pretended that the questions hadn’t circulated.

“Here,” Will said as he returned with a dark blue shirt.

“Thanks.”

_***Jump Then Fall***_

“We… could go together?” Will suggested awkwardly.

“You mean the way girls go in a group when they don’t have dates?” Nico questioned as he wrinkled his nose at the pathetically dramatic homecoming proposal that was taking place in front of the cafeteria.

Will shrugged, though Nico wasn’t looking at him. “I mean, I guess.” Nico glanced over at him. “Or, you know….” Nico raised a dark eyebrow and Will felt his cheeks color. “We could just go together.”

“Like… _together,_ together?” Nico asked in surprise. Will shrugged again. “You sneaky little shit,” Nico scoffed. Will looked at him in surprise. “You’re asking me to be your date all nonchalant like!” He stood up and grabbed his tray. “Well, I’m sorry but if you want me to be your date, you need to have a pretty awesome homecoming proposal up your sleeve, my friend.”

Nico began walking toward the trash can and Will called after, “I thought you didn’t like the dramatics of proposals!”

Nico laughed and made his way back. “For other people. For me it’s different. Come on, you’re my best friend, you know me.” He leaned over the table. “You’d better make it good. And to relieve some pressure, I’ll let you know now that I’ll say yes.” He winked and Will felt a large smile spread on his face.

A few days later, Nico began walking down the hall to his third period, his nose buried in a book he’d begun a few hours before. He heard a loud whistle that he immediately correlated to Will and looked up.

Down the hall, Will was standing with poster boards and helium balloons. Nico suppressed a smile and put his book up as he walked toward him. Other people had stopped walking and began to look when they realized a proposal was happening. Even more stopped and began to crowd when they realized it was Will proposing to Nico.

Will turned the poster boards over and Nico read.

 _So you like to be dramatic…_ He changed the poster. _And that’s okay. I’ll play along…._ Nico raised an eyebrow and crossed his arms. _Well, everyone thinks we’re gay anyway…._ Nico laughed and a few other spectators did too. _So why don’t we just go for it?_ He dropped the poster and showed what Nico thought was the last one. _Will you go to Homecoming with me?_ Nico started to talk, but Will held up a finger. A few people in the crowd were giggling or hooting to express their approval.

Then Will revealed the actual last poster.

_And maybe be my boyfriend too?_

The spectators went crazy. The girls were cooing, the guys were shouting, some people were whistling. And many of them were shouting for Nico to say yes.

Nico’s mouth had fallen open at the last poster. He looked at Will who was biting his lip nervously. Both of their hearts were pounding through their chest.

Then Nico stepped forward and pulled Will into a kiss he’d been wanting to give him for a very long time.

“About fucking time!” someone shouted. Nico and Will broke the kiss to laugh, but it didn’t last long before they were kissing again.

_***Crazier***_

“I think my dad knows. He just never says anything,” Nico said as he finished typing up an essay while he laid on Will’s lap. “I mean we’ve been dating for a year, there is no way I didn’t slip up somewhere.”

“Didn’t you leave our photo booth pictures on your desk?” Will questioned.

“I used them as a bookmark, yes, and that’s my point. I’m pretty sure he knows, he’s just waiting on my… verbal affirmation.” Will’s hand ran through Nico’s hair and Nico met his eyes. “Somehow it’s still a scary idea to actually tell him.”

“I know,” Will assured. He nudged Nico off then laid down beside him. “I’m just asking when I’ll be able to stop looking over my shoulder for your dad. It’s almost impossible to hang out at your place because you think he’ll catch us.” Nico frowned scooted closer to him. He enjoyed being so close. He enjoyed the warmth of his arms, of his smile, of his words. It made everything else irrelevant. “I don’t want you to feel pressured.”

“I never feel pressured with you,” Nico murmured. He shut his laptop and pushed it aside. Then he leaned forward to kiss Will, pulling himself onto him and smiling as he pressed their lips together. “You want to know a secret?” Will hummed. “I didn’t like you when I met you.”

Will scoffed and bit his lip gently. “Mm, well, I didn’t like you either,” he muttered. Nico raised an eyebrow. “You were rude. A bit pretentious.” Will tilted his head. “Actually you still are. Why am I dating you?”

Nico narrowed his eyes. “You’re such a jerk, Solace.” Will laughed in his adorable way, pushing his tongue behind his teeth. Looking at him this way, Nico couldn’t help but smile. He was absolutely perfect. He was his best friend, his other half, his balance. “Want to know another secret?” Nico whispered.

“Mm, sure,” Will said, reaching up to push Nico’s hair away from his face.

Nico leaned down and pressed his lips against Will’s, laying against him completely as he did. Will’s arm came around his torso and hugged him tightly as the other rested against the side of his face. Nico pulled back and looked down at Will, into those bright blue eyes he’d become so used to seeing every single day. The eyes he knew he’d never tire of. Then he leaned close, his eyes shut, his lips brushing Will’s, and whispered, “I’m so in love with you, it’s driving me crazy.”

He heard Will gasp slightly and opened his eyes. Will was looking at him with furrowed eyebrows, but before Nico could say anything, Will pulled him into a kiss, sliding his hands into his hair and trying to pull him closer than they already were.

It wasn’t until they needed to catch their breath that they pulled away. Then Will murmured, breathlessly, “I love you too.” Nico smiled down at him as his cheeks colored. Even after a year of dating, Will couldn’t control his blushing. But Nico seemed to love it. He loved him.

And that was all that Will needed to know.

_***Mine***_

“Nico, we don’t have the resources to go out right now,” Will protested.

“Oh come on. We haven’t gone out in so long, love. We deserve at least one night to ourselves that isn’t just a movie on the DVD Player and Ramen noodles.”

Will furrowed his eyebrows. He loved those nights. “Well, that’s what it’s like in college. We have a low budget. And bills. Lots of bills.” Nico turned to him and frowned. “What?”

“It’s always about money with you. Why can’t you just try to enjoy things?”

Nico rolled his eyes and began to tug off the shirt he’d put on for their “night out.” Will clenched his jaw and shut his eyes. “I _do_ enjoy things. I enjoy those low budget nights where we watch DVD movies and eat Ramen! You’re the one that wants to spend money we don’t have!”

Nico whirled on him, wearing just a tank so that the pale, jagged, faded scratches left from that dog so many years ago were showing. His muscles were taunt, his face angry. “If I want the night out it’s because I have the money.” Will took a deep breath and calmed himself down. “If it bothers you so fucking much that we’re struggling, then why are you here?”

“What are you talking about?” Will asked, his eyes widening.

“I’m talking about how you grew up with this money-making family all your life. Your dad’s a doctor, your mom was a singer, she’d take you to travel along with her. Now you’re stuck, and you can’t stand it.”

Will shook his head, feeling the rage build in his body. “Don’t,” he warned, gritting his teeth. “My father was gone almost all my life on his job. My mom took the celebrity idea to her head. And you know that. Don’t use it against me!”

“Poor little rich boy has to be poor for the first time in his privileged little life,” Nico spat, turning away. “You know what, don’t go. I’ll go by myself. I’ll go and enjoy myself and be the twenty-one-year-old college student I am instead of this middle aged broke loser you make me feel like.”

“Nico, don’t you fucking walk out of this house!” Will shouted as Nico put his shirt back on and walked to the door.

With his hand on the doorknob, he said, “Just come with me. Spend one night without worrying. We’ll get through it, we always do, baby.”

Will’s expression softened and he sighed. “Neeks, we just don’t-”

He didn’t get to finish when Nico opened the door and walked out, slamming it shut behind him. Will felt his words wither and fall into his stomach like stones. The echo of the door shutting emphasized the silence that followed. Will rubbed the temples of his head and turned to the bedroom.

His father had gotten him a house to stay at while going to college. It was rented, and it was up to Will to pay the bills and luxuries he wanted. And of course he’d had Nico move in with him their freshman year.

The first few months had been great. They had their life together, they woke up to each other, fell asleep with each other, spent the days wrapped in each other on the couch or on the floor, laughing and watching whatever they wanted. Being far from home wasn’t so bad with Nico at his side.

But the charm had worn off and reality kicked in. The bills began to pile up. The oven pizzas and Ramen noodles became stale. The schoolwork had them both so stressed and left them with very little patience for each other. They’d argue over everything from money to what to eat to leaving a candy wrapper on the floor.

But Nico had never walked out on him. He’d never spoken so bitterly.

Will started working on his homework in the living room, cautious, waiting for Nico to come back. It became midnight and he wasn’t home. Will called and Nico didn’t answer. When he tried again, it went to voicemail.

Then, some time later, his phone rang and he answered it quickly. “Where are you?” he asked.

“Um. In my dorm?” Paolo answered. Will sighed and cursed under his breath. “I take it you’re expecting a call from someone else?”

“Not really,” Will muttered. “What’s up? Did the homework confuse you again?”

“Well, that and I was wondering if you were up to get a burger. I haven’t eaten and I just got out of my internship at the hospital. No one else I know is up at one in the morning.”

Will sighed. “That sounds great, but I just had an argument with Nico about going out when we have no money. And we’re in the middle of an argument now, I don’t really know how….”

“Ah, yeah, I get it,” Paolo said. “No worries. Do you want me to take you a burger or anything? Just so you’ll eat.”

“No. No I’m okay, thank you.”

“Okay. I hope everything works out. See you later.”

“Bye.” Will hung up and sighed, pressing the phone to his forehead. He heard footsteps outside the door and then the doorknob was being moved. A few moments later it opened and Nico shuffled inside, his eyes closed, as he took a deep breath. “Nico?”

Nico’s eyes opened and Will realized how unfocused his eyes were. “Oh my God,” he said in disbelief. “You’re drunk.”

“I told you to go with me,” Nico muttered.

“You have to be fucking kidding me!” Will shouted. Nico narrowed his eyes and turned to him. “You want to tell me that I’m a prick about money, but you’re wasting it on alcohol to get yourself drunk when we might not even have fucking electricity tomorrow!” he yelled, stepping closer.

“Oh please, Solace,” he said rolling his eyes. Will narrowed his eyes and shoved him against the wall. “Whoa, it’s about time you got a little rough with me.” He smirked, much to Will’s annoyance. “Go ahead and punish me, baby,” he said, looking at him with half-lidded eyes. He laughed and Will let him go, groaning in disgust.

“This isn’t a fucking game, Nico. God, you reek.” Nico remained leaning against the wall, his eyes following Will as he paced back and forth. He could hear his labored breaths and gulps. And then Nico was moving from the wall, shutting his eyes, stumbling down the hall. Will didn’t even follow him. He knew where he was going.

The labored breaths had turned into gasps and then Will heard the retching. He grimaced and shook his head as Nico’s body repelled the alcohol in its system. A few minutes later, he heard the toilet flush and the sink turn on. He could hear Nico brushing his teeth and then he heard him shuffle out of the bathroom, groaning.

“Nico,” he called. He heard Nico groan, but then he was back in the living room, staring at Will with tired eyes. “We need to talk.”

Nico’s eyebrows furrowed and his eyes turned red. He nodded and kicked at the carpet. “Go ahead. Go ahead and break up with me and kick me out. I’ll go get my things while you’re at it.”

He started for their bedroom and Will panicked, racing forward to stop him. “Whoa, hey, what?”

His brown eyes were filled with tears he wouldn’t let fall. “Look, I give you props. You stuck around longer than most people. But I get it. You want something more than this, someone better, a better life, and I get it, I get it.” He tried to walk past Will, but Will grabbed his arms. He pulled away angrily and began to shout. “No! Don’t be nice to me! Don’t pity me, don’t forgive me because you don’t want to prove me right! You want to break up with me, I know it, I can see it in your eyes!”

“Nico stop!” Will shouted back. “You left me mid-sentence, you wouldn’t answer my calls, and you come back stupid drunk. I have every right to be angry.” Nico scowled and turned away. “Hey! Don’t walk away from me, Nico!”

Nico turned and threw his hands up in exasperation. “There is nothing to say, Will! There’s nothing! You want to break up with me, and I get it! I fucking get it, so just let me walk out. Don’t make this worse, don’t pretend you don’t.”

“I never said anything about breaking up with you, Nico,” he protested. “I-I mean are you trying to break up with me? Is that what this is?” Nico’s lips parted and his tears flooded over. He dried them quickly and turned away, starting for the door, but Will rushed forward and grabbed him before he could. “Hey, hey, no. Don’t, please,” he begged as he turned him. Nico shut his eyes and looked down at the floor.

“Look at me,” he moaned. “I’m nothing for you. I’m a disaster. You have to be tired of me by now.”

“No. No,” Will protested, putting his hands on either side of his face. “Look at me, baby.” Nico’s wide eyes settled on his, watery and red. “We’re both a disaster, okay? But you deal with me and I deal with you and it’s because we love each other. Okay? We love each other, Nico.” Nico’s face crumpled further. “You… you love me, right?” Will asked.

“Yes,” he sobbed. He wrapped his arms around him and began to shake his head. “I’m sorry, Will. I’m so sorry. I love you, I love you so much.” He kissed his cheek, his jawline, his lips, his neck. And Will held him, trying to calm him down.

“Hey, hey,” he shushed. “Nico, I’m not going anywhere. I’m not leaving you. I just need you to listen to me. I’m angry, yes. We argue, yes. But you said it yourself, we always get through it.” Nico had his interlocked behind neck, his forehead against Will’s. “Get some rest. We’ll talk about this in the morning when you’re calmer. Come on.”

Nico followed him back to the bedroom and when Will sat him on the bed and tried to help him change into sleepwear, he gripped his shirt and pulled him down onto him. “Nico,” he murmured against his lips.

Nico shook his head and scooted up on the bed, pulling Will over him. “Let me love you, Will. Please. Let me forget how fucked up we get. I want to be sure. I want to be sure, please.” He took Will’s hand and placed it at the button of his jeans.

Without another word, Will undid the button and leaned in to kiss him. As they undressed in the dark room and kissed and ran their hands over each other, Nico tried to forget. He tried to forget and replace everything with the sensation of Will’s touch, of his warmth, his breath at his ear, his lips against his skin, his teeth biting gently.

_***Forever & Always***_

“Come on, just spend the night,” he murmured against his throat.

“Percy, stop,” Nico begged. “You know I can’t do that. I’m not supposed to be doing this in the first place.”

“That’s what you said last time. And the time before that. And the time before that.” Nico scowled as a pair of green eyes glinted mischievously. “You said it yourself. He doesn’t pay attention.”

“He’d know if I was gone all night.” Percy hummed as he pulled himself onto Nico.

“You’re already here. May as well.” Nico hesitated, then Percy rocked his hips and Nico’s common sense was overridden.

“Fuck,” he hissed, pulling Percy up and shoving him against the wall, immediately meeting his lips. Percy laughed triumphantly, wrapping his legs around Nico….

Hours later, Nico got home and took a breath before going inside. Will was the table studying for a test he had coming. “Hey, love,” he said as Nico came in. “How was work?”

“Tiring,” Nico answered. “Studying?” Will nodded. Nico walked forward and kissed his temple before wrapping his arms around him. “How long have you been sitting here?”

“A few hours. I’ll take a break in a bit.” Nico nodded and leaned down to brush his lips against Will’s neck. He chuckled and tilted his head to make him stop. “Don’t distract me,” he said with a smile. “Otherwise I’ll never get this done.”

Nico smiled and rested his head on top of Will’s. “Okay,” he murmured. “I’m going to take a very long, very hot shower. You’re welcome to join me.”

Will chuckled and lifted a hand to run through Nico’s hair. “Okay, baby.”

Nico left and went to the bathroom to take a shower. He tried to scrub away every forbidden touch and kiss and scratch left by Percy. He didn’t know why he kept going back to him. He didn’t know why he kept giving in. He wished he’d never left that day he fought with Will. It had been months ago, but ever since, Nico had turned into someone he didn’t know for himself.

Ever since then, Percy had managed to get a hold on him and Nico couldn’t stop running back to him.

Meanwhile, Will finished the chapter of the textbook he was on and stretched. They had to go grocery shopping soon, and although the cable was out, they were better off than they had been a few months ago. Nico had stopped insisting on going to extravagant places in the middle of the night and Will did his best to at least have something different to eat each night.

Their relationship was so much better.

When he put away his things, he was surprised to see how late it was. He went to the room and saw Nico changing. “Hey, what time did you get home?”

“About two hours ago, I guess.” Nico put on his shorts and shook out his hair. “Why?”

“It’s late.”

“I had a late shift. That’s why I was asking how long you’d been studying.” Will furrowed his eyebrows. Nico got into bed and began scrolling through his phone.

Will got ready for bed and laid down beside Nico. Nico put his phone up and rolled to his side, facing Will, and shut his eyes. Will smiled and leaned forward to kiss him, pulling him closer. He could feel his smile against his lips. “What are you doing?” he chuckled.

“I didn’t catch you in the shower, but this works too, don’t you think?” Will murmured. Nico grunted and placed a hand on his arm. “What is it?”

“I’m really tired.”

“I’m sure I can wake you up,” he answered.

Nico chuckled and shook his head. “Just… come here.” He pulled him in and kissed him gently. Then he leaned his head against his chest and remained still.

Will sighed and smiled into his hair, holding him close. He rubbed his hand along his bare back soothingly.

He frowned when he felt the torn skin. His finger traced the wound and he asked, “What happened here?”

“Where?” Nico asked. Will pressed against the scratch and Nico winced. “Ow. Oh I was trying to get through a gate and scratched my back on a wire. I’d forgotten about it.” Will frowned and made sure not to touch the scratch as he lulled Nico to sleep.

The next day, Will woke up to Nico an empty bed. Had Nico left for work already? He usually woke him up before he left.

Shrugging it off, Will got up and got ready to go to class. He was doing much better there too. After the two morning classes he had that day were done, he sat in the park benches near the library and tried to keep cool with an icy soda from the vending machine.

He didn’t usually wait out there, but Paolo had asked him to meet up, and he hadn’t seen his friend in a while. A few minutes later, he heard, “Hey.” He looked up and saw Paolo walking toward him. “How’ve you been?”

“Great, really. You?” He smiled and nodded in agreement. “So, you want to go get lunch? A late breakfast?”

“Sure,” he said with a smile. Together they started for a nearby IHOP and ordered food. “So how’s stuff with Nico? Ever since that one fight you guys had, you haven’t mentioned him much.”

“Oh, we’re better. Way better. We don’t argue anymore.” He shrugged and took a drink from his soda. “I think… I don’t know. I mean we’ve been friends since we were freshmen in high school. And now we’re going into our sophomore year of college. We live together, we know each other, we… we’re happy.” Paolo bit his lip, but Will didn’t notice. “I think he’s the one. You know? I think I want to marry him. I know I do, I-”

“Will,” Paolo interrupted. “I… I need to tell you something.” Will furrowed his eyebrows. Paolo sighed and pulled out his phone. “Please don’t get upset with me, okay? But….” He placed the phone on the table and pushed it toward Will. “That’s Nico, right?”

Will frowned and grabbed the phone. His jaw dropped along with his stomach when he saw the picture. It was dark, but he knew Nico like the back of his hand. He knew his posture, his features no matter how dim, his face. And it was him. It was him with a drink in one hand and his arm around another guy beside him.

“When… when did you take this?” Will asked, talking through the knot in his throat.

Paolo let out a shaky breath. “Last weekend. I went to the bar because there was a band playing that I liked. And I saw him, but I didn’t know for sure if it was him. I only know him from your pictures on Facebook.” Will furrowed his eyebrows.

“What were they doing?”

Paolo hesitated, but answered. “Kissing. Whispering. Groping. They ducked out before the show was over, but when I followed, they were long gone.” Will felt a wave of nausea roll through him. “Will, I’m sorry. I’m so sorry, I should’ve told you while I was there-”

“No, don’t… don’t apologize. Um… I’m not hungry anymore. I think I’ll go home.” He cleared his throat and tried to ignore the burn in his eyes. “I need to go home,” he whispered. Paolo nodded and gestured for them to leave.

When Will got home, he could barely manage a thank you to Paolo before going inside. He went through his phone to check his messages with Nico that last weekend. He’d said he took a late shift. He said he’d be home late. And when he got home, Will remembered being woken to gentle kisses trailing down his body.

The memory made him sick to his stomach.

_***You Should’ve Said No***_

It’d been a month. A month of Will indulging in Nico’s strange behavior, waiting to see a change. He’d become colder toward Nico, but Nico didn’t seem to notice. He continued with his “late shifts” and nights where he slept close to Will only to disappear in the morning. It felt like he was living alone.

Paolo kept checking on him. Asking if he was alright, if he’d said anything yet. But Will was waiting. He wasn’t sure for what, but he was waiting.

Then one night, he had the perfect excuse. He pulled up to the corner of the street and turned off his headlights. He pulled out his phone and called Nico.

“Hey,” Nico answered.

“Hey, baby,” Will said, glaring at the house, drumming his finger on his steering wheel. “I got caught up studying in the library, so I’ll be home late.”

“Oh okay,” he answered easily. “Well, my boss asked if I could take an extra shift. I wasn’t going to take it, but if you’ll be out late, I guess we could use the cash, right?”

Will chuckled. “Whatever you think is best. Don’t tire yourself out.”

Nico laughed and the sound angered Will. “I’ll see you later okay? Love you.”

“Yeah. Me too,” Will whispered. He hung up. A few minutes later, he saw Nico leaving the house and getting into his car. Once he was down the street, Will turned his headlights back on and followed. He kept his distance, making sure at least one or two cars separated them.

Something told him that even if he’d been driving right beside him, Nico wouldn’t have noticed.

He drove, keeping a distance once they entered a neighborhood and waited at the corner of the street before turning in and looking for Nico’s car. This was obviously not a job. That much should’ve made Will turn back around. But he didn’t. He looked for his car and found it halfway down the street. He turned off the headlights and waited there for a few minutes, gathering the courage to do what he wanted to do.

He felt like he was going to be sick.

“You know,” Percy gasped against Nico’s lips. “I really think you should just move in here.”

“Mm, baby steps,” Nico breathed, biting his lip. “Come here.” He pulled him in and unbuttoned his shirt. “I was going to go crazy if I didn’t see you soon.”

“Is your boyfriend not pleasing you, baby?” Percy smirked, unbuckling Nico’s belt and pulling down his jeans. Nico kissed him and leaned over, pushing him back onto the couch. “Oh God,” he moaned as Nico kissed his neck.

Slowly, Nico unbuttoned his jeans and tugged his pants down. He straddled him and took off his shirt, sighing as Percy’s hands ran over his torso. “Why don’t we go to your bed?” he whispered. Percy nodded and he pulled Nico along by the waistband of his boxers.

Within minutes, Nico was holding himself up over Percy, panting and listening to him moan his name. Percy nails dug into his back, scraping down desperately.

Suddenly, the sound of the doorbell resonated through the house. “Do you need to get that?” Nico panted, hovering over his lips.

“Fuck no,” Percy hissed pulling him down for a kiss. Then the doorbell rang again. Then again. And again. “What the fuck?” Percy groaned. “One sec,” he said.

Nico got off of him and took a breath as Percy pulled on some boxers that didn’t do anything to hide his bulge. He smirked as Percy left the room.

Will was seconds away from breaking down the door. He rang again and the door opened. A dark, tousled haired, green eyed man in boxers opened the door, grimacing. “Can I help you?” he snapped.

Will looked at him and felt his breaths turn shallow. “I think so.” He pushed past him and went into the house much to the guy’s annoyance.

“What the hell are you doing? You can’t just walk into my house like that!” he shouted after him.

“Percy? What’s going- oh _fuck.”_ Nico stepped out of a room wearing his own boxers and Will stopped walking abruptly. “Will,” he breathed.

Will felt dizzy. He felt nauseous and angry. His chest was collapsing, making it hard to breathe, causing him a physical pain in all of his body. “You son of a bitch,” Will spat.

“Will, no, wait,” he begged, trying to run forward despite the obvious inconvenience in his boxers. As soon as he was close enough, Will hit him. He hit him and shoved him against the wall, shaking with anger and hurt. “Will! Please!”

“Don’t fucking touch me!” he hissed. He felt Percy pull him back and he turned, pinning him to the wall on the other side. “ _You._ You _really_ don’t want to fuck with me any more than you already have.” Percy’s eyes widened and Will let go. He turned back to Nico. “Don’t even try going back to my house. Don’t fucking try.”

He stormed out and slammed the door behind him, racing to his car as his tears overflowed and his anger subsided, allowing the pain and grief to overcome him.

Nico stared at the door for all of two second before he was racing to get his clothes. “I have to go,” he said, feeling a knot in his throat.

“What’s the point?” Percy said angrily. Nico looked at him and found his shape to be blurry. He was crying. “You’ve been coming to me, fucking me for five months now. Now he catches you and you want to go crawling back? Back to what, Nico? Everything you ran away from the first time? Everything that pushed you to me to begin with?”

“You don’t get it,” he said with a broken voice, grabbing his things. “We have… years, Percy. Years that built our relationship, I can’t… I can’t just….” He shook his head. “We shouldn’t have done this.”

Percy scowled and stepped forward. “You weren’t saying that ten minutes ago. Ten minutes ago you were moaning obscenities mixed with my name.”

Nico furrowed his eyebrows and looked at Percy. “I’m sorry. I have to.” He turned away and left the house. He got into his car and sped back home, barely even shutting the engine off before he was running to the door.

Will hadn’t been home for long before the door burst open and Nico ran in, fully dressed. “Will! Will, baby please, let me explain.”

“Get the hell out of my house,” Will growled.

Nico shook his head and fell to his knees in front of him, holding onto his legs. “No, no, please. Please don’t do this to me, baby please. I love you so much. I fucked up, I know, I fucked up so bad, but I can fix it. I can fix it, I promise I’ll be better, Will.”

“Get off of me,” Will said numbly, shoving him away. “You don’t get to fix this, Nico. I found out about this a month ago. This isn’t a onetime thing.”

“No, it was, I promise you it was!” He clasped his hands together and shook his head desperately. “I messed up, I know I did. I was stupid, and I wasn’t thinking. And I know it sounds so cliché, but it’s true, Will. If I wanted him, I would’ve stayed at his house. I wouldn’t have cared about you finding us.”

Will grimaced and walked away from him. Nico stood and stumbled after him holding onto his arm and pulling him back. “Don’t touch me!” Will shouted, feeling his heart shatter.

Nico put his hands on either side of his face. “Please, Will. Please don’t do this, don’t throw what we have away. We’ve been together so long, don’t… don’t give up on me. You promised me you wouldn’t leave me.” Will scowled and shoved him back. “Will!” he cried.

“You cheated on me, Nico! You’ve been fucking another guy for who knows how long and I-” His voice broke and he turned away, trying to stop crying. He didn’t want to cry in front of him. Nico didn’t deserve to know how much he’d hurt him.

“I’ll tell you anything you want to know, Will. I’ll be completely honest with you. And I’ll stop, I promise you, I’ll stop seeing him and talking to him. I’ll be good to you. Just please don’t break up with me.”

Will furrowed his eyebrows and crossed his arms. “When did it start?”

Nico gulped and wiped at his eyes. “I….” He sighed. “Remember the last big fight we had? And I came home drunk?” Will scoffed and looked up, trying not to let his tears fall.

“That was half a year ago,” he whimpered. He gulped, trying to clear his voice, but the knot in his throat and the pain in his chest made it impossible. “How?” he asked.

Nico screwed his eyes shut and let out a sob. “I was angry with you. And I was drinking and he came up to me and started flirting. And I played along. And the next thing I knew he had me in the bathroom and he….” Nico sighed and shook his head.

“He what, Nico?” Will growled.

“He… blew me,” Nico choked. Will took a sudden, deep breath and moved away from Nico. His hands were shaking. “I felt so horrible when I got back. I wanted you to break up with me to punish myself for what I did. But you wouldn’t and you kept saying you loved me. And I love you too, Will. I love you so much.” Will shook his head, refusing to look at him. “All I wanted to do was hold you, Will. I felt terrible.”

“Oh, but months later, you’re fucking him without feeling anything!” he snapped. He ran his hand through his hair and grit his teeth. “Fuck you, Nico. Fuck you. I told you not to go. You should’ve stayed. You should’ve thought of all of this before you let him. You should’ve stopped seeing him after that. You shouldn’t have let this go on for so long!”

“I was an idiot, Will, I know that!” he begged. “But this is who I am, I’m a mess! I don’t know how to love someone properly, but I want to try to figure it out with you. I was weak, but-”

“Stop,” Will said, his voice stronger than it had been. “You weren’t weak, Nico. You were a fucking asshole. I gave you so much of my life. And you told me you loved me, you promised me so much. And none of it mattered. You kept hurting me. How long did you think this would’ve gone before I found out?” Nico didn’t answer. He just stared at Will with his tears running freely down his face. “I’m giving you ten minutes to pack a bag and get out.”

“Will-”

“Now!”

Nico let out a heart wrenching sob and turned to the bedroom. Will didn’t keep track of the time, but soon, Nico was at the door with a duffel bag in his hand and his face was splotchy and wet. “Will, please. I’ll be better, please just let me stay.”

Will stood and walked over to him. He shook his head and opened the door. “Will,” Nico breathed. He took his face in his hands and Will shut his eyes and grimaced. “Will, please. Don’t you love me?”

“Get out,” he croaked. Nico leaned in and pressed his lips to Will’s. The act repulsed Will. He pulled away and shoved him back. “It’s over, Nico! Leave!” Nico looked like every part of him had been broken.

He picked up his bag and walked out, his shoulders shaking as he reached his car.

_***_

“It’s been so long. I miss you. We can’t stay like this. Please, just let me talk to you,” Nico begged. Even a month and a half later, the sound of his voice broke Will’s heart.

“Why should I?” he asked softly, trying to keep his voice steady.

There was a long pause. Then, “Don’t you love me?”

Will took a breath and thought back. He thought back to the day they’d met. To becoming friends. To the mischief they got into. To the homecoming proposal, and the day Nico had told him he loved him. He thought back to the day Nico introduced him to his father as his boyfriend and the day Will asked him to move in with him. He thought of their first time. Of the arguments and struggles that seemed so insignificant compared to the wonderful, beautiful moments they’d had.

And he answered, “…Yes.”

“Then please give me another chance.”

Will took a breath and thought of the day he found him undressed in another man’s house. To the scratches he’d been stupid enough to believe had been caused by his job. To the mornings he’d wake up to an empty bed and the nights he fell asleep alone, waiting on Nico to come home. To the kisses and touches shared in those last handful of months that he hadn’t known were being shared with someone else.

He took another breath and before he hung up, he let it out in a single syllable:

“No.”


	2. The Story of Us

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The closure, the end result of the pain and heartbreak of the past. To show that better things come.

Years had passed. Not many, but enough to where Will had managed to control his life again and steady himself. Enough to where he was happy again. Enough to where he’d long since stopped asking himself what he did wrong, what he could’ve done better, whether he should have let him back, or if something was wrong with him.

He and Nico hadn’t talked in all that time, and now, Will often forgot of the heartbreak, the pain, of him. It had been so long, and he’d pushed it away.

So when he sat at Starbucks to read a book and let his surroundings melt away, then was suddenly jarred from the fantasy by the sound of his name, he couldn’t help the dizziness that overcame him.

The voice was familiar. Though he hadn’t processed it until he looked up and saw Nico standing in front of him.

He’d grown a nicely trimmed beard. He looked thinner, darker, and his hair was shorter. His eyes were just as dark as Will remembered and his eyebrows were pushed together in a worried, nervous expression.

“Hi,” Will answered in surprise.

“How have you been?” he asked, shifting his weight.

Will put his book down, putting a napkin to mark his place. “I’ve been good. You?”

“Yeah. Me too. I guess.” Will cleared his throat awkwardly and gave him a tense smile. Nico bit his lip and scratched the back of his head. What was he supposed to do? He didn’t want to leave. Not after finally seeing him again. He wanted to drink in every last detail of Will’s features from the shade of blue his eyes were in the sun to the curves and waves of his hair to the sound of his voice. “Do you mind if I sit?”

Will gulped and shrugged. “Go ahead.” Will watched as Nico sat down, his hands interlocking anxiously the way they did when he was nervous. “I like the beard,” Will said gesturing to his own face.

“Thanks,” Nico said, chuckling. “It’s actually pretty hard to keep it clean.” The corner of Will’s mouth twitched upwards. “So… how’s school?”

“Good. I’m going grad school next month.” Nico’s eyes widened. Will used to always talk about that, but worried he wouldn’t have enough money. “What about you? Did you stick to communications?”

“No. No, I changed to criminal justice.” Will’s eyebrows went up and he smiled. “Yeah, I had to make up a course this summer, so I’m graduating late. But I did it.”

“That’s good. I’m happy to hear that,” Will said sincerely. Nico smiled and let his eyes steady on him.

He bit his lip and gave Will a nervous smile which Will returned just as nervously. Seeing him again was so bizarre. It felt so strange. Will didn’t have it in him to be angry anymore, but he was still hurt, and seeing Nico sitting in front of him like this brought back so much. Like the memory of his mannerisms as he fidgeted. The memory of the comfort he used to feel with him in comparison to the tension he felt now.

“Um, what have you been up to?” Nico asked, still not wanting the interaction to end, even if it was filled with tension and discomfort. It had been years…. Was it possible to get Will to try again?

Will sighed, not really knowing what this was getting at. “Just… studies. I got a job, I got my bachelor’s, I started seeing someone….” Nico’s heart clenched and a knot began forming in his throat. Will shrugged. “I made my life.” Nico was looking at him with solemn eyes. Will noticed his jaw tense.

“You’re seeing someone?” he asked, with an attempt at a light tone. Will nodded.

“Aren’t you? I mean, I thought….” Will wasn’t sure how to phrase it without sounding so insecure. He’d thought Nico had gone back to the man he’d been seeing behind his back. He thought he’d moved on because Will hadn’t been good enough to begin with. He figured Nico had gone right back to finish what he was doing after making a proper scene and forgotten about him.

But Nico shook his head and looked out at the street, giving a humorless chuckle. “No. No, I haven’t. I….” He wouldn’t look at him and Will noticed his Adam’s apple bob as he gulped. “Um…. After… you know. I never went back. I had this… stupid hope that I could fix it. That you’d call me again.” He scratched his head awkwardly. He had made a mistake, a horrible, horrible mistake, and still he had thought Will loved him enough to forgive him. He thought they could try again and maybe they would be together now. “And then you didn’t. And I never saw you anymore. And now I look up and see you sitting here reading a book.” He chuckled again and looked down. How was he supposed to tell him that he wanted another chance? He’d moved on.

Will looked down at his own hands and furrowed his eyebrows. “There was no going back from what happened, Nico,” he said softly. He felt his head spin as Nico’s name fell from his lips for the first time in years.

“I know,” Nico answered. “I just… I don’t know.” Will cleared his throat and sighed. “Are you happy now, Will?”

“Yeah. Yeah, I’m happy,” he answered. Nico nodded and tried to be happy for him. He knew he should be. Nico had made him miserable. He could still remember the look on his face when he saw him leaving Percy’s room. When he kicked him out. When Nico told him what he wanted to know. He remembered his broken voice on the phone. He’d hurt him so much.

So why couldn’t he be happy with the fact that someone had cleaned up the mess he’d made of him?

“And I know you will be too. Maybe you just needed closure. But you’ll move on too,” Will assured.

He noticed Nico’s breathing stutter and clamped his mouth shut. He felt the words spill from his lips before he could stop himself, putting every vulnerability on the table. “I was happy. I was happy with you. And no one would ever give me that much happiness again, closure or not.” Will felt his cheeks flood and his arms stiffened. “You have to know, Will. You have to know that I regret it every single day of my life. I hate myself for what I did to you. And I wish I could go back and fix it. Because I’ve never loved anyone as much as I loved you and I never will.”

Will scoffed and grabbed his book. “No. You don’t get to do this,” he snarled. Nico looked at him sadly and started to talk. “No!” he snapped. “It took me a year to let go of you! Even after what you did to me, I couldn’t stop wanting you back. You broke me, Nico! And I’ve been piecing myself together for the past three fucking years. And I let someone in again, I let myself hope again! You don’t get to prance back into my life and tell me you loved me and try to bring it all back. You don’t have the right.”

“Will, no, I’m sorry. I didn’t…. I don’t want to upset you. I just feel like I had to tell you everything I never got the chance to before.” Will shook his head and stood up. “I’m sorry,” Nico cried. “Look, I’ll-I’ll go. Okay? Just stay and read your book. I just… I had to tell you. I’m sorry. I’m so sorry. For everything.” Nico stood and ran his hand through his hair as he turned away and started down the street. It felt like it had happened all over again. He felt like he was leaving yet another piece of him behind. And he wished he had never left the house that day so long ago.

Will glared after him, huddled against the wind, his hand in his hair as he walked away. He rubbed his forehead and left the coffee shop. When he got home, he saw Paolo sitting on the couch watching a cooking show. “Hey,” he greeted.

“Hey.” Will fidgeted and sighed. “I have to tell you something.”

Paolo furrowed his eyebrows and muted the television. He gave him a wary glance and nodded. “Are you okay?”

Will nodded and began to pace. “I saw… Nico today.” He glanced at Paolo worriedly.

His eyebrows were raised and he blinked a few times. Then he cleared his throat and began to tug at the hair at the nape of his neck. “Um. And what happened?”

“He apologized. For all that happened. And he said he’d never love anyone like that again.” Will shook his head and shut his eyes.

“Do you… want him back?” Paolo asked gently.

Will’s eyes shot open and he raced forward to the couch to sit beside Paolo, taking his dark hands in his own. “No,” he murmured. “No, no, not at all. I let go of him a long time ago, you know that. I wouldn’t even date you until I did.” He looked at him and bit his lip. “I just wanted to make sure you knew. Because I hate secrets. I’d hate the idea of you not knowing.”

Paolo placed a gentle, coarse hand against the side of his face. “I know. I know,” he whispered. “It’s okay.”

“I don’t love him anymore,” he whispered, shutting his eyes. And it was true. It had taken him a long time, but he had been able to let go of everything he had once felt for Nico. He had let go and gotten better for himself and allowed himself to feel hope that he could open his heart again. And Paolo had waited for him.

Somewhere between helping him keep up with school work and helping him get out of bed and keep himself decent, Paolo had begun to develop feelings he had pushed away when Will was dating someone else. And the idea had scared Will at first. Because all he could think was that it might happen again. That he’d get hurt again. And he couldn’t stand the idea of that happening.

But Paolo had been patient. He’d helped him and kept his feeling to himself until Will had begun to act more like himself.

Will remembered the day so well. It had been a month and a half since the last horrible breakdown over Nico’s memory. And he’d found himself laughing more. He found that everything stopped reminding him of his heartbreak. He found that he couldn’t feel angry anymore. He didn’t like how it had changed him.

And he’d gone to a comedy movie with Paolo and they’d left, still laughing at the movie, Will talking animatedly. Paolo had taken him home, and as Will thanked him for the movie, he’s leaned forward and kissed him.

Surprisingly, Will had kissed him back. And that’s when he knew he’d be okay. But he still wouldn’t let himself date him. Because he was still afraid.

Now, after a year of dating, Will was able to say he no longer loved Nico with complete honesty. “I promise you I don’t. Even if he begged at my feet, I wouldn’t go back to him.” Paolo let out a shaky breath and Will leaned closer to him. “You’re the one who has my heart. You’re the one that kept me from falling apart. I’m happy with you.”

“I love you, Will,” he whispered. “I will never hurt you the way he did.”

“I know,” Will murmured. “I know.” He leaned forward and kissed him. As he did he felt the tension of his meeting with Nico melt away.

Maybe at one point Will had believed his life would revolve around Nico. Maybe he’d believed he would be his one and only. But after feeling like his world had ended with that break up, he couldn’t help but marvel at where he was now.

He was in grad school. Because Paolo had encouraged him to push through his studies. He’d encouraged him to find financial aid to get further like Will wanted. He was in a happy, trusting, love-filled relationship. Because Paolo had been patient, letting Will pull himself together. Because Paolo knew what Will’s fears were and where they stemmed from, and he knew how to reassure him. He was in a much better place now.

Not only because of his relationship with Paolo, but because Will had enough sense to know that no matter how much he had loved Nico, there was no way to make things better after the way he’d been treated. He’d felt worthless, yes, but he knew better than to let himself stay that way. He’d built his worth back, and now Paolo simply reminded him of it every day.

Will didn’t want to go back. He didn’t want to change anything. Because he was stronger, happier, better off. And it was worth it.


End file.
